"Your Words Are Like Knives..."

I haven't updated in a bit.. I have no excuse, really.

So Aimee (unless she's lying to me) doesn't have the linnk to this anymore.. Thank the lord (haha lord). I don't know.. It's just friggin weird.

Yeah, so monday we had a snow day... more like an ice day.

You know who pisses me off? Chanel. UGH. She always has... Ever since we were kids.. There's just something about her... -shrug-

I think I'm doing an OK job of hiding my feelings nowadays... It's like. Fake fake fake fake.

Fake.

No, I swear I'm happy.

Fake.

It doesn't bother me, your touch isn't electric.

Fake.

This laugh is genuine.

Fake.

I'm not thinking about her.

Fake.

Tears aren't waiting to fall any second.

Fake.

Not every song remind me of how much I miss her...

Fake.

I don't want to cut, I don't want to drink, I don't want to get drugged up.

Fake.

Everything I am is fake.. I feel so shitty... I just... I don't know what to do anymore. I just want everything to go back to the way it was. I think... If I had done ONE thing different. If I had just told a drunk Aimee to wait, that we had ALL day the next day to make out or whatever...

We'd still be together.

I would be happy.

And

I wouldn't have to think sad thoughts every second of the day.